Story of my life.

“My friends have made the story of my life.”

I could easily expand on this quote to say: my friends have painted the pictures in my life’s storybook, my friends keep the pages of my life’s book bound, my friends are the creators of life’s greatest adventures, and so on. Regardless, I love this quote because at its core, it accurately represents how I feel. My friends are one of my greatest joys in life as they make me laugh, push me outside of my comfort zone, teach me new things, pull me up when I’m feeling my lowest, and give me the confidence that I lack. There’s something unique and different that I admire in each of my pals, but the common theme is that they are all raw, true, kind, loving, and caring people. They’re exactly who I want to be when I grow up.

I am constantly encouraged and inspired by my friends. They are the handiest, sassiest, toughest, hardest-working, smartest, prettiest, funniest people around. When creating my blog each week, I try to base it on something that has inspired me. Amidst best-friend-weekends, girlfriend phone calls, and bachlorette parties, it only seemed fitting to talk about friends and friendships.

The value I place on these relationships is definitely a mirror image of my parents. One of the most admirable, and one of the few traits my parents actually have in common, is the attention they place on their friendships. If you’re a friend of either of my parents, consider yourself lucky. They’ll fight like a bulldog on your side, give the shirt off their back, and give you their last penny. They love their friends as family, and have taught me to do the same.

Because friends are the family you get to choose, I’m blessed to have an extended tribe. They come in all shapes, sizes, ages, hair colors, backgrounds, personalities, walks of life, career paths, and so on… that’s what makes life so fun. I’ve got close friends, mutual friends, old friends, new friends, high school friends, college friends, work friends, and friends that stand the test of time. I love the ideals, thoughts, and values that everyone brings to the table. They cause me to think outside the box and give me fresh perspectives on life. I feel like a glorious melting pot of my peeps.

As with everything in life, there’s positives, negatives, and plain ‘ol reality. I’ve had to accept the fact that friends and friendships evolve. Time helps some to flourish, and others to wither. I used to take it as a personal insult when I felt like a friendship had run its course and was dying out, but that’s life. There’s no doubt that I want to hold on to, and grow, each of my friendships, but know that you can’t force things. People change, and quite frankly, you don’t have to be friends with everyone (I wish I’d come to this realization years ago!). It’s not that you don’t love friends you’ve lost contact with, it just means you cherish the memories and support them when or where you can.

In the same hand, when friendships fall out in a big way, let it go. I’ve learned not to get wrapped up on grudges. Whether there are hard feeling or not, who cares?! As adults we have the clarity, brain capacity, and emotional maturity to focus on what’s truly important and throw the rest away. If you’re happy in your life, why can’t you be happy for others? There’s no rule in Life’s Handbook that says everyone has to be best friends forever. Holding on to hate or dislike doesn’t benefit anyone, in fact it strains mutual relationships. While you don’t have to like everyone, or care deeply about everyone, you do have to be nice to everyone. Life is meant to be loved, and you can’t love with your whole heart if you’re holding on to hate.

With that said I want the theme for my life to be love and laughter. I want to love big, love more, love and let be, and I want to belly laugh as often as possible. My friends can (as my mom would say) “turn my frown upside down”. I encourage new friendships at every opportunity, and want nothing more than to continue celebrating life with my pals.

My commitment to my friends is to simply be a listening ear, a shoulder to cry on, a pillar of support, a phone call away at any hour, and to constantly work on being a better friend. I know I can get wrapped up in my own life and become somewhat of a recluse. I also know that sometimes it feels like too much time has passed, and oh my gosh is it weird if I reach out? Nope. Friends forgive, they understand when life happens, and they’re always happy to hear from another friend. A true friendship just loves and supports.

Memories are forever painted on my heart, and I thank each of my friends for making those so vivid, wild, and colorful. Cheers to the next 80 – I plan on many more beers, martinis, weekend trips, cry sessions, life lessons, highs, lows, and celebrations.