Santos Soirée Finale

Posted byjcasaccaPosted inUncategorized

Oh boy, I sit down to write this blog after a long, six month hiatus. The “six” part of this equation was a bit unintentional. I meant to take a small break to decompress after the wedding (they are lovely and exhausting things!), but life had some other plans! It has been an intense, action-packed six months that has taken some me to some joyous and monumental highs, and surprised me with some twists and turns – but, before we get into all of that, let’s talk about how the Santos Soirée truly came together…

Getting Ready

Jumping right in! So much fun, anticipation, and nerves. Okay, maybe a little stress, too! It was a bit daunting to think of all the things to do, and all the things left to come together.

…while (trying to) stay on schedule!

Regardless of the planning, preparation, and organization that is done leading up to a wedding, the day-of is always a bit chaotic. Now, it doesn’t have to be pants-on-fire emergencies, but there are a lot of finishing touches to coordinate in just a few hours before guests start showing up. In my original plan, I had myself, the moms, and aunts setting everything up the morning-of. I had planned to be there at 5 am, and to make sure every single detail was just how I wanted. Now if you know me, you know I am a perfectionist and have a textbook Type-A personality. Had this plan come to fruition, I would have made myself sick agonizing over everything, been stressed, and probably really cranky. (Yahoo, who wants to marry that?! Ha!) Fortunately for Jared (and all involved) I have a couple friends who drew a line in the sand – no going to the venue and setting up the morning of my wedding, and dammit whether I wanted to or not I was going to relax and soak in every moment of my day. Running around setting out flowers and plates would NOT be tolerated. (Thank you Sara and Kenzie!)

This lead to Jared and I’s single-best decision for our wedding, especially the “getting ready” part – asking someone we trust endlessly to coordinate the day-of proceedings. This “someone” ended up being a voice of reason throughout the final planning details, gave suggestions, was an amazing buffer, and allowed us to focus on being happy and enjoying vs. worrying about where, what, and if things were coming together (vendor deliveries and set up, final decorations, wrangling bridal party members, schedule, procession, etc.). She not only was there for the day-of set up, but spent the week with Jared and I getting the venue ready (the not so glamorous part of building your own venue!). This calmed so many of my nerves and fears, and took some of the weight off my shoulders (I am getting nervous sweats just thinking about setting up for our wedding…). I can’t recommend enough having someone you trust to carry the baton to the finish line. Fortunately our “someone” is basically my aunt, has done countless weddings before (so had great ideas of how to circumvent issues and head things off), and knows my family (aka she could herd their wild spirits). I mean, she ran Michelin-star restaurants in five inch heels, while making it looks effortless. A honky little wedding was no hurdle for her! And thank goodness, it truly would not have been the same experience without her.

In addition to our coordinator/wedding saver, one of the (other) best things we did to keep stress to a minimum, was to rent a house near the venue. It was an amazing house that overlooked the river (great for getting-ready pictures!), and served as a central point for everyone – bridal party, family, makeup and hair, photography and videography. This is also where we stayed the night of our wedding and the night after the wedding (gave us a chance to relax). There was plenty of room for any bridal party and family that wanted to stay, too! The house was beautiful and cozy – Avenue of the Giants Hilltop River View Home. I would love to make it a tradition to stay here yearly… it is beautiful, relaxing, and reminds me of our special day.

I started the day with a cup of coffee outside (fresh air is my version of a chill pill), and writing up our list of thank yous for the reception. Kenzie, my Maid of Honor, got breakfast ready as we waited for the rest of the girls. I had little gift bags waiting for each of my bridesmaids with a flannel sleep dress to get ready in (with their names on the back), socks with a print that reminded me of them, a pair of butterfly earrings to wear that day, and a card. I also had little flannel dresses customized for our flower girls! So tiny and so cute.

We started hair and makeup early, to ensure we had enough time for pictures and to keep things moving! One of my biggest fears was a late start to the ceremony and a huge lag of time between the ceremony and the reception. Fortunately this was nothing more than a worry, our hair and makeup teams were awesome, and we stayed right on track!

Hair – Nastassia has done my hair (especially formal hair styles) for years, so my trust and confidence for day-of was 110%. Plus, I have know Stasha since I was born, as our moms are best friends, so there was basically no one else I wanted to touch my hair! I told her a rough idea of what I wanted and let her go to work from there. We didn’t do a trial run before the wedding, but again, she knows me and my hair so I didn’t have any concerns. For the girls, I wanted their hair to be the same – simple, pulled back, with some colorful flowers added in. The dresses were dark (emerald velvet) and I loved the pop of colors that were in the bouquets and the arrangements sprinkled throughout the wedding, so I thought adding some to their hair was a perfect combination. Plus, it felt like it helped tie all the little details together.

Makeup – this was easy and relaxing! I had done a trial run with Maria previously and was so confident and comfortable with her. She is a true professional (and perfectionist), so I knew whatever she did it would look amazing. I wanted a subtle makeup look that would photograph well. I let her do her thing with each of the girls, and choose any particulars they wanted. It went really easily and smoothly, and was very un-stressful! I also visited Maria prior to the wedding for a spray tan and eyebrow wax – all in all, I loved every experience with her! I felt beautiful and confident on my day thanks to her.

While we were getting ready, I asked Zulie to get some “special detail” photos. In particular I wanted our invitations, as they set the precedent of what to expect for design and detail at the wedding, my bouquet and all the special additions there, and photos of my wedding dress with my mother-in-law’s and my mom’s (I thought – how special to have both of their dresses, and maybe one day we can have them hung up with my daughter’s!). I am very sentimental so each of these little things meant so much to me! I wanted all of my family – new, old, and no longer with us – to be a part of our day.

Once we were all ready, we did some photos at the house. I asked that my mother-in-law be there as I wanted her to feel a part of the getting ready proceedings, and she is such a calming force! I love spending time with her, and loved having here there as we were getting ready. Of course my mom was with me all morning, and I asked my dad to come early. I was *hoping* for that special father-daughter first look – I didn’t get my vision, but the end result was much more us!

Pre-Wedding

I was torn on whether to see Jared before the ceremony and get our bridal party pictures checked off the list, or have that traditional “first look” while walking down the aisle. I couldn’t decide, so I left it in Jared’s court. He opted to do a first look and take pictures beforehand. I am so glad we went this route!! Everyone is different as to what makes them the happiest, but this worked best for us. We were able to capture the photos in the redwoods I had dreamed of (these kept the theme of our engagement photos, too), getting some pre-wedding nerves out of the way, and allowed us to spend more time with our bridal party! We had such a great and fun group of people, that this was really special. We took photos, drank some beer and had a few whiskeys, and laughed. I loved this short, but fun period of time. I especially loved that this meant we had a shorter lag period between the ceremony and reception.

These characters just make me laugh… how could you not want to soak in some extra moments with them?!

Ceremony

Our ceremony was short and sweet, but so meaningful. It began with my Grandpa Garth driving me to the aisle in his and Gram’s old Chevy. In fact, they have an amazing photo from their wedding night with the old car that Jared and I recreated! I loved having these few minutes with my Pop before the ceremony. Having him there, and the old car, felt like I had a little piece of Gram with me.

Waiting to help me out of the car was Dad, then he and Pop walked me to the aisle. From there, Pop handed me off to Lawrence (my step-dad) and Lawrence and Dad gave me away. It was very important to me to include my step-dad, albeit a bit untraditional. All three of these men – Pop, Dad, and Lawrence – are so important to me that my day wouldn’t be complete without all of them playing a role.

When it came to the actual vow part, I was a little nervous… I will be honest and say I hate wedding ceremonies. They’re sappy and long, and just don’t do it for me. As with all of our wedding, I wanted it to be true to Jared and I, so we looked at a number of vows and scripts, then mix-matched them to fit our vision. It was even more special that our officiant was my boss/mentor/friend, Richard. He certainly added color and made our ceremony that much more fun and “us”. My dad also milled the boards and slabs for the stage we stood on. I will never get over how unique and perfect it turned out! It was so special to have his craftsmanship a part of our ceremony. We opted to stand on a stage, for the simple fact that those in the back pews and rows could see/hear more easily – I highly recommend!

And, why yes, of course my darn church pews made it! They needed some touching up after the long drive, but they did in fact make it into the final vision. For additional seating we set up hay bales – easy and on-trend! I knew a lot of people would opt to stand (that’s cowboys for ya, plus we had the bar open!), so I didn’t worry too much over the additional seating.

For aisle decorations we did alternating rows with stained wood boxes (compliments of my mother-in-law) with pairs of boots with flower arrangements in them. This rounded out the western, meets bright-and-colorful vision I had in mind! Of course there were some cowhides also sprinkled in, and dad marked the end of the aisle with a beautiful arch made with logs/boards he had milled. Actually, I had planned for dad to build an arch over where we stood, but once we started setting up, we all fell in love with the natural beauty of the tree. It felt so authentic and whimsical to have the tree as our alter.

Oh, and yes, I did mark the end of the aisle with wine barrels that served as ice chests for beer and water… And yes, we did grab one and cheers on our way out!

Playlist

I am not a huge music buff, but there are some songs that speak to my soul… again, I wanted every last detail to reflect who we are and our love.

  • Family and Groom walking down the aisle: Settling Down (Miranda Lambert)
  • Bridal Party walking down the aisle: Butterflies (Kacey Musgraves)
  • Bride walking down the aisle: A Red, Red Rose (R.W. Hampton) Oh these lyrics!! Pure love and beauty.
  • Bride and Groom exit the ceremony: Soul (Lee Brice) We are all about the upbeat jams!
  • First dance: All Your’n (Tyler Childers), cut into You Ain’t Dolly (Ashley Monroe/Blake Shelton) This was so fun!! We are not very sappy, so we did a short and sweet clip of an upbeat love song, then switched into a faster-paced song that made us crack up! I can hear it now – “You ain’t Dolly/And you ain’t Porter/She’s a little bit fuller/And you’re a whole lot shorter”. I think everyone got a kick out of this little surprise!
  • Father-daughter dance: Eighteen Inches of Rain (Ian Tyson) This song just reminds me of being a kid and riding with Daddy out in the hills – we had no money but spent every weekend riding out in the hills and gathering cows, we had so much fun! He is the reason for my love of everything Ian Tyson. This tune feels like the soundtrack to my childhood, I couldn’t think of anything better.
  • Step father-daughter dance: All Around You (Sturgill Simpson) Again, maybe a bit untraditional, but dancing with my step-dad was important to me. This song just felt like the kindness and love he’s always had for me.

All other songs for key moments – the bouquet and garter toss, cake cutting, etc. – were all pretty standard. We had an amazing DJ so I let him do his thing! The only other special song/dance I requested was the anniversary dance, I love seeing the couples who have been together for 30, 40, 50+ years out on the dancefloor. It makes me excited for when we’re the oldies left standing out there!

Reception

I had a vision for our table settings and reception for months – I wanted that whimsical, elegant, western, classic look (can I throw some more words in there?! Ha!). A lot of preparation went into this part, and I am *mostly* happy with how it came together. Unfortunately the wind played a huge factor, which we couldn’t control. So many of the bud vases were little, and they got knocked down. I hope everyone still thought it was colorful and magical, I know friends and family kept trying to prop things back up!

We set the tables up in a different pattern – we mixed rounds and rectangle tables. I wanted the focus to be the dancefloor, so that everyone could see without having to get up and move around. This created a fun design! Each of the place settings was also complete with a real plate – a mix-match of white, white and gold, and white with floral print – a cloth napkin, and a tied set of silverware. My mother-in-law prepped all the silverware, making it easy to set out. My coordinator also helped me arrange boxes of table decorations (candlesticks, bud vases, etc.) for each of the tables, so that the day-of set-up would be quick. My amazing flower vendor also grouped flowers per table to keep colors and textures the same for all. This also made it easy for the set-up team to fill vases.

Special Details

I think you know by now that I wanted our wedding to feel thoughtful and magical. There are so many little details I poured into our day that made me smile. Here are a few of the big ones!

  • Mom and Suzette’s wedding dresses
  • Bouquet with Nana’s hankey and Gram’s gold cross
  • Sign in area – we had the sign in book sitting on the entertainment center/table my dad built me (with a pair of boots and flowers on it), and had one of our engagement photos propped up. We threw some cowhides down, and added a cowhide chair/hay bale to set gifts on. Functional, and all within theme!
  • Custom match boxes – this was my mother-in-law’s idea and I loved it!! Match boxes have an old school vibe and are so different/easily customized. The boxes were a dark green to match our wedding colors, and had gold lettering that said J+J on one side, and Santos Soirée and our wedding date on the other!
  • Old Chevy, and Grandpa driving me to the aisle
These are my grandparents in the old car on their big day!
  • Dad and Lawrence walking me down the aisle
  • Stage – built by dad.
  • Church pews – a traditional and cozy feel to an outdoor wedding.
  • Signs – our sweet friend Jess made all the signs we used at the wedding. We wanted the signs to be helpful/functional, while tying each of the areas together (our wedding had lots of space to roam and different things to do!).
  • Cocktail napkins & hand sannies – these are such an easy and custom detail! We had some cocktail napkins printed with the the calf photo from our invites (with our brand on its hip). They were set at each of the different cocktail tables (and bar), along with some little hand sanitizers that had the same calf on them and said “Spread Love, Not Germs”.
  • Cheeseboard – I had been dreaming of this board for as long as I can remember. Specifically, I had been wanting a brie wedding cake… check, check! People loved this special board, as it was very “us”. It was also delicious, and great for snacking/appetizers between the ceremony and dinner. Featured on this board were all of my favorite cheeses and vendors, along with local and family goods. We had my Aunt’s cheeseball (one of my favorites!), as well as the salami and sausage my step dad and grandpa make. Some of the cheese companies on our cheeseboard were: Pt. Reyes, Face Rock, Sartori, Rumiano, and Reny Picot. This was a huge hit!
  • Menus – the same amazing designer who created our invites, also designed our menus, hand sanitizer labels, and we used the art she designed for other touches! This kept the design and flow through all aspects of the wedding – from engagement and invites to dinner, drinks, and dessert. It also made it so custom and special, and I loved each of these little details. Savvy at Ranchology made all my visions come true and was a dream to work with (she is the sweetest and kindest)! These definitely completed my vision for our day! (I actually have one of the Bar Menus hung up in our house, above our little house bar.)
  • Dinner/food – holy cow. I know I am biased, but the food at our wedding was bar none the best. This was the most important aspect to Jared, and he wanted down-home good food. I am so glad we went the route we did. It was a unique, but tasty offering and everyone loved it. Starting with the meat – the beef and pork were home-grown by my momma, and all meat was barbecued by Cook’s Catering. They did a fabulous job making sure it was cooked to perfection and delivered hot! My Auntie + the Aunt Posse homemade the loaded potatoes and corn casserole. I am still drooling over these, and am hoping I can convince Auntie to make us an anniversary dinner every year! Every dinner needs some salads, so we had a green and fruit salad. Our green salad was dressed up with our favorite Parlato accessories. (Parlato’s was a delicious, local Italian restaurant, and my favorite, that has been closed for a number of years, but fortunately we know a gal! And were able to have the garbanzos made special.) The fruit salad was a bit contentious… but delicious.
  • Food and salt and pepper shakers – another of my mother-in-laws ideas that were simple and sweet!
  • Dessert board – dessert is my favorite meal of the day, and we have some really special desserts in our family. So, I recruited our family and some of my favorite vendors, to create a cheeseboard-style dessert board! This meant there was something for everyone to enjoy. Plus, it was so pretty! I am in love with every sugar cookie Krystle’s Sweet Sensations makes (she made cookies for my bridal shower, too!), no event is complete without Mamoo’s snow balls, and of course Gram Pam’s 10 Pound Brownies. We also included some Alexandre Family Farms milk (plain, chocolate, and vanilla) in the wine barrel by the dessert board. A perfect pairing for washing down those delicious sweet treats! They were great for kiddos and anyone wanting a refreshing drink. This was one of my favorite parts of the wedding.
  • Cake topper – I really didn’t know which direction to go for our cake topper. The options overwhelmed me, and I was so thankful when my Aunt suggested using the topper from her wedding, that also graced Gram and Pop’s cake. I love these sentimental tokens.
The cake toppers on my grandparents’ wedding cake, were used on my aunt and uncle’s cake, and ours!
  • Branding boards – Jared was really unsure about this, but I am so glad we did these! We asked everyone to bring their brand, and dad milled some slabs. After dinner we fired up the branding pots and branded the slabs. We will have these forever, and will make a bar top out of one! These are so special, and were a fun thing for people to do.
  • S’mores + Fire Pit – we had some smaller pews and dad brought in a ton of firewood, so we built a semi-circle seating area with the pews, with a firepit in the middle. This created another seating and relaxing area for guests. It was so nice to have different places and things for people to do and spread out. We also supplied some s’mores materials! Again, guests loved this little touch (especially the kids!).

Vendors

Advice

There are of course some things I wish I would have done different! And planned a little better –

  • Remember your veil. Ha!! What a surprise when I got to the alter and realized I forgot my veil, eh – po-tay-to, po-tot-toe! Can’t win ’em all. I am glad I bought mine on Amazon for about $15, so there wasn’t much loss (although I’ve dreamed of a cathedral veil since I was about six years old). I threw it on for some pictures and called it macaroni. It was honestly probably a blessing in disguise, as it would have been one more thing to try and keep under control and not get stepped on!
  • Wind! It was a real booger. It definitely effected the decorations and design I labored over, but, I suppose you can’t control everything! And it helped keep things cooler. (I am still trying to get over this little day-of aggravation – ha!). In hindsight I should have had a few more contingency plans for this to keep vases up and table cloths in place. My mother-in-law thought to spray paint some horseshoes, which ended up being really helpful, but I could have had more plans in place.
  • More ice – my goal was to fill up the half wine barrels, but I didn’t order enough ice, so they looked a little empty and not a luscious as I had hoped (we also put a vase/bouquet of flowers in each to add some color). My advice – order more than you think!
  • More family photos – as expected, everyone kind of scatters after the ceremony. I wish I had pushed for more of the family photos, as we didn’t get all of Jared’s family. (I had outlined all the groups and combos I wanted – key to making sure you don’t miss anyone.) Since our wedding we have lost two of our beloved grandparents. It was so special to have them there, I wish we had been able to capture more photos of them!
  • Making our rounds and talking with everyone – I am still kicking myself for not making more rounds during dinner. By this point in the day, I was pretty well exhausted and basically puddled at the head table with a red beer and enjoyed dinner and laughs with the bridal party. I didn’t get around and talk to all of our family and friends, which I still feel so guilty over. I wish I could do this part over. One bride mentioned she and her husband went to each of the tables and took a picture with them – it made each table feel special, and was a way to check off the “thank yous” and “hellos”. I thought this was a fabulous idea and wished I had though of it!

Final Thoughts

Ah, a sigh of relief to be done with the “big day”. I loved it, truly, but it was such a blur I don’t feel like I really soaked in all the magical touches I labored over. Which, makes me a bit sad, but I have also since realized that our wedding was one day in our lives. It was beautiful, and we spent it with the people we care the most about, but it was just the starting point. Every great and wonderful, and hard and challenging, part of our marriage comes next. Weddings get hyped up to be the best day of your life, and for everyone getting married I hope it is everything you dreamed of! But the best days of our young marriage have been since “the big day”. I sound like a sap (gosh, I hate that!), but the truth is, everyday life has been way better than our wedding. I’ve never loved Jared more than when he cooks me pancakes on Saturday because he knows they’re my favorite, or when we sit down and watch our favorite shows together, or simply going book shopping together and grabbing a sub from our favorite shop. And now, we’re on the journey to parenthood together. These are the moments I dreamed of. I am so happy we soiree-d all night long, and started our marriage embraced in love, but my heart is so full looking at everything ahead of us.

All things to keep it mind if you are in the midst of wedding planning…

I would be remiss if I didn’t also mention how thankful I am for our friends and family. Without them, all of this would have just been a wish. They made our day come together, and poured as much love and work into it as we did. I don’t think there are enough thanks or ways to express how much I/we appreciate them.

…and my husband… how did I get so lucky. To put up with my ideas, make them reality for our special day, and to make each day better. Without a doubt, I certainly married-up!

Cheers!

Don’t forget to follow me on social – Instagram @beerinamartiniworld and Facebook Beer in a Martini World! In between blogs you will enjoy daily anecdotes and updates, more wedding pictures, and fun ideas!

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